Reaching out and connecting with outdoor (street-based) sex workers.

Hi everyone, myself and a few friends of mine that have a bunch of outdoor (street-based) sex work experience decided to do some training for all of you that are interested in the street-based economy, and how to offer support.

Specifically we drafted two documents, How to be an ally to outdoor(street based) sex workers and how to outreach to outdoor (street based) sex workers, the short version.

My favorite is the how to be an ally document, and it’s short, so I’ll repost that here below.  This is not intended to replace the more general version sex workers put together earlier, but to augment it:

1. Don’t push yourself on me in the name of help if I don’t want or need it. I have the ability to make decisions for myself. Honor my decisions even if you don’t agree with them.
2. We have lots of people offering us “help,” but most are NOT actually meeting our needs. Meet my needs, not your desires. If you don’t know what my needs are, it is ok to ask.
3. If you offer help and I accept, follow through on your promises. Do not lie to us or give us a false sense of hope. Be real about how much you can and will help.
4. If you offer help, I want it to address my immediate needs! Not something that will help me 5 years from now. For instance, if I don’t have food, a place to sleep or my fix, then scholarships for school have very little relevance in my life.
5. Some people are happy in this life. Thinking I require help OUT of this life is bad thinking on YOUR part.
6. Don’t assume I’m strung out and need help kicking. Maybe I’m not strung out or maybe I have no desire to quit.
7. Don’t pity me or feel sorry for me. Remember, anyone can end up in a rough place in life. When someone pities you, it makes you feel “less than” or ashamed of your lack of ability to get yourself out of the rough situation you found yourself in. Remember, it could be you standing here working next to me later!
8. If you want to help, make yourself available and perhaps offer options. Let me choose the type of help I want/need, not what you think I need.
9. Don’t judge me! If you are judging me, you are not in a position to help me.
10. Don’t tokenize me. Street-based workers come from all different races, genders, religions, socio-economical backgrounds and education levels. Don’t assume that just because “Pretty Women” is your favorite movie, you know me.
11. Be patient if I need help. Chances are I’m in survival mode, and you need to respect where I am, not where you want me to be.
12. Respect me. Don’t be afraid to look me in the eye.

Looking at the Schapiro Group “Scientific” Survey

This survey was done in the fall of 2009, several months after CraigsList changed the Erotic Services section to Adult Services so that it could begin charging for ads and handing over the information to authorities if requested. Remember, this was in response to a huge national campaign accusing CraigsList of being a haven for underage prostitutes. It stands to reason that men who want the simplicity of paying for sex with an underage girl would look to CraigsList. The media did all the advertising work necessary for both sides of the possible exploitation equation (pimps and clients). Not to mention that since CraigsList was getting a lot of media attention, lots of people were perusing the Adult Services section, regardless of age preferences.

Their study finds that 23% of men in Georgia have tried to buy sex in one month. This is probably true. The usual self-reporting surveys in the US yield numbers of 6-15%, which any sex worker can tell you is artificially low. Quite honestly, the vast majority of clients are not on CraigsList, which means the percentage of clients could be even higher than 23%. They have to be to support the number of sex workers out there. The vast majority of these unnoticed interactions are between adults, not teens.

Outdoor “street” work question answered.

I get asked a lot about street work, or as I like to call it Outdoor work.  These are my experiences and understanding, and may not be the same as someone else’s.

Briefly my experiences:  I’ve worked outdoors for a while, once while homeless, and more recently I’ve worked in front of grocery stores and the like.  I have done the ‘stroll’ type work, but only in small cities and towns, never in larger cities like LA or SF.

Experiences in larger cities, I can only speculate on, or share from friends/family that have done that type of work.  Also, I’m trans* not cisgendered, and that makes a difference in experiences as well.  I’m not trying to say these conclusions or thoughts below are always correct, but that from my perspective at this time, they seem correct.  My goal is only to help people realize that:

1) Not all outdoor work is unsafe (and that you can do any work safely)

2) It’s not like the stereotypical 3am drug addicted street walker who spends their entire career trying to avoid rape and get high, while avoiding physical abuse from their pimp, like in the movies.

YAY! On to the show and tell then:

Outdoor or (street) work is a very WIDE and BROAD subject, just like indoor work is.  People just assume the worst whenever I speak of outdoor work.

First, while 3AM walking the street in the worst neighborhoods does happen, it’s not as common in street or ‘outdoor’ work as one might think. (it’s much more common in BIG cities), but in smaller cities and towns it’s much less common.  (I’ve only worked in smaller towns and cities).

So, in outdoor work, there is homeless work, where you are always working, and your clientele is of the lower income variety.  (I’ve done this work), it’s mostly a lot of trade for sex work, and not a lot of actual cash.

Another type of work is opportunity work, i.e. someone hits on you while you are out doing your normal routine.  Most every woman has had the beginnings of this experience but few turn it into an opportunity to make money.

Another type is daytime work.  This can be waiting where people tend to congregate. Malls, grocery stores, big chain stores, stuff like that.  (I like grocery stores myself).  Obviously this is only valid during the day, and evening.  Trying to work from these places at 3AM is pointless as there is no foot traffic.

Hopefully this gives you a better idea of the varied outdoor work environments.

As for safety, some types of outdoor work can be unsafe, especially if you don’t know your fellow workers.  But to last out there you form relationships with as many as you can, and try to create a safe situation for yourself and others. Also the other difference is you get to look the client in the eyes, well before you agree to anything.  (unlike with indoor work)  All types of work require a ‘screening’ as we call it. Where we check the client over and get a feel for them as a person.  Some people do this better in person, and may be better situated for outdoor work, vs people doing this via email or telephone.  So

I wouldn’t say that it’s a LOT less safe, I would just say it’s a different type of safety.

For me, I love being outside, and would spend time out there anyway, so if there is an easy way to make a few dollars while hanging out outside, why shouldn’t I take the opportunity?

I’ll just wrap up and say one more thing about outdoor work (but also important in any work), boundaries are crazy important.  Think about and set hard firm boundaries of what you are willing and not willing to do.  Your boundaries WILL get tested, and you WILL get asked crazy ridiculous things.   Will you do Anal? Will  you do blowjobs? Condoms? Fluid Barriers for blowjobs or facials? These questions are the tip of the iceberg.

If you have experience (directly or indirectly) I’d love your thoughts and comments on what outdoor work is like for you.  I think the better we can share our experiences, the more people will come to think of street or outdoor work as not something ‘BAD’, but just different.

Sex 2.0 founder criticizes local alt’s coverage of Atlanta sex workers

Rhea sums up her problems with the article, in a letter to the editor not published at this time:

The first, and most obvious, is that Gower and Denby are dangerous vigilantes. […]

It should go without saying that posting videos of sex workers on YouTube is a horrible idea. What is the goal? Sex workers – especially street prostitutes – are disproportionately the targets of violent crime. Violent criminals target sex workers because they know they can get away with it. […]

[Author] Nouraee fails as an investigative reporter with this piece, especially as one for a paper that claims to be alternative. Terms like “transvestitute” and “real female” go unchallenged and uncorrected. Nouraee does not probe Gower about why Gower is so fixated on harassing prostitutes. He does not examine how the criminalization of prostitution perpetuates the violence that many people associate with street prostitution. He does not discuss the societal and economic conditions that lead to many transpeople working on the streets.

More here

Melissa Farley, comparing actions and alliances to her words

Farley has published more than 25 peer-reviewed publications on sexual violence, prostitution and trafficking. She has spoken with a thousand women, men, and the transgendered in prostitution in 10 countries on 5 continents. She talks about the psychological harm of prostitution, her expertise based upon interviewing 1,000 women men and transgendered prostitutes. Ms. Farley presents herself as a strong advocate for prostitutes. Perhaps she is. But there are also actions and alliances from her past which challenge the credibility of her understanding of the psychology of prostitutes. In 1996 Ms. Farley along with Nikki Craft wrote “Why I Made The Choice to Become a Prostitute“. Perhaps they felt it was comical and amusing to insult the intelligence of prostitutes, to imply that prostitutes are motivated by sexual desires for their step fathers, even comparing prostitutes to being grade A ground beef and the cow simultaneously. Many women that identify as survivors of prostitution have written to Ms. Farley stating their concerns about this piece. These women in prostitution’s viewpoints were ignored or perhaps not pertinent because she was not studying them or already had. Why would a researcher with more than 25 peer-reviewed publications on sexual violence, prostitution and trafficking feel that such a piece below, after being reviewed by survivors of prostitution, sex workers, advocates of sex workers and strongly opposed continue to stand behind such a condescending and insulting literary publication?

Ms. Farley maintains a strong alliance to activist Nikki Craft, sharing publication credits, by Craft’s definition being close colleagues of thirty years. Ms. Craft in her website Always Causing Legal Unrest advocates the firebombing of porn stores, promising to publish the pictures of porn stores that have been the target of radical feminist arsonists guaranteeing confidentiality. While they and others oppose pornography, is arson a valid method of opposition? What if there were people inside? Whether they be employees, customers, even porn actresses themselves, do they deserve to be injured or killed in a firebombing? Is it ethical to publicize this type of action guaranteeing the confidentiality of the criminal? Would that confidentiality extend even if there were deaths? It does not state otherwise in the Always Causing Legal Unrest website which Ms. Craft owns, Nikki Craft and other radical feminists support through their publication of literary works upon. See “One Hot Shot, Burn Baby Burn, Madison Wisconsin Porn Shop Burning and further states in red “WANTED ONE HOT Shot! Large Detailed (!) Picture of Porn Shop Burning! The website proclaims “There are visitors to the ACLU website who have hot fantasies about burning porn stores down. If you have any pictures let us know and we’ll post them on this site for your viewing enjoyment. Privacy will be Protected”

Chilean Sex Worker Rights Advocate and SWOP East Latin America’s advisory board member Beatriz Mercado stated upon reading “Why I Made the Choice to Become A Prostitute” that she could not believe women would write such a piece instead expecting that kind of mockery and vitriol towards prostitutes be the work of junior high school boys. Instead, much to Beatriz’ shock it is the work of a prostitution expert who proudly states her understanding of the psychology of women in prostitution and her ally.

Ms. Farley in her recent study in Nevada stated “30% of her funding was from the Trafficking in Persons Office of the US State Dept” which if the case represents an important question of whether the US State Department is aware they are giving grant money to researchers collaborating openly with an activist advocating felony criminal actions that could easily lead to serious injury or death openly proclaiming she would obstruct justice in the event her invitation to arsonists is taken at face value.

These are important facts to consider when pondering the expertise, ethical basis and independence of the studies

Nikki Craft and Melissa Farley

co-authored the following article

I became a prostitute because . . .

1. I saw Pretty Baby and it reminded me of my stepfather and I thought I could get paid for it.

2. I saw Pretty Woman and I liked the clothes.

3. I saw a Demi Moore movie and I thought, Wow, what an easy and fun way to make a million dollars.

4. I like getting fucked by the football team, the fraternity brothers, and law students at graduation parties. I realized that gang rape could be a transcendental experience.

5. I figured that laying on my back and getting fucked by hundreds of men, and getting on my knees and sucking thousands of dicks, was the most profound empowerment a woman could have.

6. My vocational counselor and I discussed a whole lot of possibilities: doctor, lawyer, women’s-studies teacher, legal secretary. I was offered a four-year scholarship at Stanford, but frankly, prostitution seemed the most rewarding job option available.

7. I worship the goddess and she told me, “Fuck mankind.” I misunderstood her spiritual message and found myself in lifetime sexual servitude instead.

8. I came to appreciate the depth of Hugh Hefner’s, Larry Flynt’s, and Bob Guccione’s understanding of my sexuality.

9. My boyfriend wanted me to do it. He said that being part of a stable of whores who worked for him could help me learn how to get along with other women.

10. My father wanted me to do it.

11. I met a nice man on alt.sex.prostitution.

12. Camille Paglia told me it was the feminist thing to do.

13. I felt coerced by my landlord, the day-care center, the utility companies, the grocer, my dealer and my plastic surgeons to pay my bills every month.

14. I didn’t want to work at Red Lobster.

15. I wanted to be treated like a lady.

16. I went to COYOTE’s Halloween extravaganza, the Hookers’ Ball, and found out just how glamorous prostitution could be.

17. It’s complicated, but I thought that working in the sex industry would increase my self-esteem. It’s sort of like saying to the world, “I am the best Grade A ground beef” and being the cow.

18. And then, ya know, even though it all sounded really good, and selling fucks and blow jobs sounded really empowering, I realized that talking about it and writing books defending it would be even more empowering.

Because Farley’s work makes people so much more sympathetic to the plight of sex workers….

A rather choice item from “District 5 Diary”, a conservative blog here in San Francisco. Somebody who doesn’t think too highly of Polk Gulch street prostitutes, evidently. And who does this person turn to to back up his prejudices? Bob Herbert’s Melissa Farley-inspired column, naturally:

The column (below) by Bob Herbert nicely frames the prostitution versus “sex worker” issue. In the progressive mind, prostitutes are now just “sex workers,” guys and gals who are simply trying to make a living. We should presumably just leave them alone to ply their trade in city neighborhoods, like Polk Street. Anyone who takes a more jaundiced view of street walkers—that is, other residents and businesses in the area—are accused of killing a “vibrant” neighborhood. [read more]

Yep, I’m sure this guy has learned from Bob Herbert that prostitutes are victims and is all about busting only the johns and letting the prostitutes go free.